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The funniest line in English is Get it? When you say that, everyone chortles.
Jokes and Jokers
Garrison Keillor

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My way of joking is to tell the truth. It's the funniest joke in the world.
Jokes and Jokers
George Bernard Shaw

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Research is what I'm doing when I don't know what I'm doing.
[ Research ] Wernher Von Braun