[ woody allen Quotes ]

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A Bay Area Bisexual told me I didn't quite coincide with either of her desires.
[ Sex ]
Woody Allen

Quotes by Woody Allen Biography of Woody Allen Quotation 29234

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22 votes


Basically my wife was immature. I'd be at home in the bath and she would come in and sink my boats.
[ Maturity ]
Woody Allen

Quotes by Woody Allen Biography of Woody Allen Quotation 18125

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21 votes


Eighty percent of success is showing up.
[ Success ]
Woody Allen

Quotes by Woody Allen Biography of Woody Allen Quotation 30681

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25 votes


I am at two with nature.
[ Nature ]
Woody Allen

Quotes by Woody Allen Biography of Woody Allen Quotation 20258

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29 votes


I don't believe in an after life, although I am bringing a change of underwear.
[ Death and Dying ]
Woody Allen

Quotes by Woody Allen Biography of Woody Allen Quotation 42790

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28 votes


I don't want to achieve immortality through my work. I want to achieve it through not dying.
[ Immortality ]
Woody Allen

Quotes by Woody Allen Biography of Woody Allen Quotation 12122

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18 votes


I think being funny is not anyone's first choice.
[ Comedy and Comedians ]
Woody Allen

Quotes by Woody Allen Biography of Woody Allen Quotation 40217

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27 votes


I was nauseous and tingly all over. I was either in love or I had smallpox.
[ Love ]
Woody Allen

Quotes by Woody Allen Biography of Woody Allen Quotation 16758

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27 votes


I will not eat oysters. I want my food dead -- not sick, not wounded -- dead.
[ Food and Eating ]
Woody Allen

Quotes by Woody Allen Biography of Woody Allen Quotation 6094

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20 votes


I'd never join a club that would allow a person like me to become a member.
[ Club ]
Woody Allen

Quotes by Woody Allen Biography of Woody Allen Quotation 40137

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30 votes


I'm not afraid to die, I just don't want to be there when it happens.
[ Death and Dying ]
Woody Allen

Quotes by Woody Allen Biography of Woody Allen Quotation 42788

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28 votes


I've never been an intellectual but I have this look.
[ Intelligence and Intellectuals ]
Woody Allen

Quotes by Woody Allen Biography of Woody Allen Quotation 12828

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28 votes


If my films make one more person miserable, I'll feel I have done my job.
[ Movies ]
Woody Allen

Quotes by Woody Allen Biography of Woody Allen Quotation 19838

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27 votes


If only God would give me some clear sign! Like making a large deposit in my name at a Swiss bank.
[ Skepticism ]
Woody Allen

Quotes by Woody Allen Biography of Woody Allen Quotation 29620

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30 votes


If you don't fail now and again, it's a sign you're playing it safe.
[ Risk ]
Woody Allen

Quotes by Woody Allen Biography of Woody Allen Quotation 27878

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14 votes


It shows exactly what you can do if you're a total psychotic.
[ Possibilities ]
Woody Allen

Quotes by Woody Allen Biography of Woody Allen Quotation 24464

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29 votes


Life is divided up into the horrible and the miserable.
[ Life and Living ]
Woody Allen

Quotes by Woody Allen Biography of Woody Allen Quotation 15161

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26 votes


Man consists of two parts, his mind and his body, only the body has more fun.
[ Body ]
Woody Allen

Quotes by Woody Allen Biography of Woody Allen Quotation 32053

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25 votes


Marriage is the death of hope.
[ Marriage ]
Woody Allen

Quotes by Woody Allen Biography of Woody Allen Quotation 17708

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19 votes


Money is better than poverty, if only for financial reasons.
[ Money ]
Woody Allen

Quotes by Woody Allen Biography of Woody Allen Quotation 19303

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30 votes


My one regret in life is that I'm not someone else.
[ Regret ]
Woody Allen

Quotes by Woody Allen Biography of Woody Allen Quotation 26850

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28 votes


On the plus side, death is one of the few things that can be done just as easily as lying down.
[ Death and Dying ]
Woody Allen

Quotes by Woody Allen Biography of Woody Allen Quotation 42789

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32 votes


Sex alleviates tension. Love causes it.
[ Love ]
Woody Allen

Quotes by Woody Allen Biography of Woody Allen Quotation 16759

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24 votes


Sex is the most fun you can have without laughing.
[ Sex ]
Woody Allen

Quotes by Woody Allen Biography of Woody Allen Quotation 29233

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28 votes


The lion and the calf will lay down together, but the calf won't get much sleep..
[ Marriage ]
Woody Allen

Quotes by Woody Allen Biography of Woody Allen Quotation 17707

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21 votes


Why does man kill? He kills for food. And not only food: frequently there must be a beverage.
[ Reason ]
Woody Allen

Quotes by Woody Allen Biography of Woody Allen Quotation 26711

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27 votes

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