Ogden Nash
19 quotations
A door is what a dog is perpetually on the wrong side of.
Candy, is dandy, but Liquor, is quicker.
The most exciting happiness is the happiness generated by forces beyond your control.
Man is a victim of dope in the incurable form of hope.
Life is not having been told that the man has just waxed the floor.
The cow is of the bovine ilk: One end is moo, the other, milk.
Every New Year is the direct descendant, isn't it, of a long line of proven criminals?
How easy for those who do not bulge to not overindulge!
Parents were invented to make children happy by giving them something to ignore.
Professional men, they have no cares; whatever happens, they get theirs.
Progress might have been alright once, but it has gone on too long.
One man's remorse is another man's reminiscence.
Remorse is a violent dyspepsia of the mind.
The only people who should really sin are the people who can sin and grin.
The further through life I drift the more obvious it becomes that I am lacking in thrift.
People who work sitting down get paid more than people who work standing up.
If you don't want to work, you have to work to earn enough money so that you won't have to work.
Children aren't happy with nothing to ignore, and that's what parents were created for.
I think remorse ought to stop biting the consciences that feed it.