[ ambrose bierce Quotes ]
83 Quotations (Page 1 of 2 pages)
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A body of water occupying about two-thirds of a world made for man, who has no gills.
[ Oceans ]
Ambrose Bierce
A coward is one who in a perilous emergency thinks with his legs.
[ Coward and Cowardice ]
Ambrose Bierce
A cynic is a blackguard whose faulty vision sees things as they are, and not as they ought to be.
[ Cynics and Cynicism ]
Ambrose Bierce
A funeral is a pageant whereby we attest our respect for the dead by enriching the undertaker.
[ Funerals ]
Ambrose Bierce
A lowly virtue whereby mediocrity achieves a glorious success.
[ Perseverance ]
Ambrose Bierce
A man is known by the company he organizes.
[ Management ]
Ambrose Bierce
A route of many roads leading from nowhere to nothing.
[ Philosophers and Philosophy ]
Ambrose Bierce
A temporary insanity curable by marriage.
[ Love ]
Ambrose Bierce
Abscond. To move in a mysterious way, commonly with the property of another.
[ Crime and Criminals ]
Ambrose Bierce
Abstainer. A weak man who yields to the temptation of denying himself a pleasure.
[ Abstinence ]
Ambrose Bierce
Absurdity. A statement or belief manifestly inconsistent with one's own opinion.
[ Absurdity ]
Ambrose Bierce
Acquaintance. A person whom we know well enough to borrow from, but not well enough to lend to.
[ Acquaintance ]
Ambrose Bierce
Admiral. That part of a warship which does the talking while the figurehead does the thinking.
[ Army and Navy ]
Ambrose Bierce
Admiration; is our polite recognition of another's resemblance to ourselves.
[ Praise ]
Ambrose Bierce
Alien. An American sovereign in his probationary state.
[ Immigration ]
Ambrose Bierce
All are lunatics, but he who can analyze his delusion is called a philosopher.
[ Philosophers and Philosophy ]
Ambrose Bierce
An accident is an inevitable occurrence due to the actions of immutable natural laws.
[ Misfortunes ]
Ambrose Bierce
An acquaintance is someone we know well enough to borrow from, but not well enough to lend to.
[ Acquaintance ]
Ambrose Bierce
An egotist is a person interested in himself than in me!
[ Egotism ]
Ambrose Bierce
Architect. One who drafts a plan of your house, and plans a draft of your money.
[ Architecture ]
Ambrose Bierce
Beauty. The power by which a woman charms a lover and terrifies a husband.
[ Beauty ]
Ambrose Bierce
Before undergoing a surgical operation, arrange your temporal affairs. You may live.
[ Medicine ]
Ambrose Bierce
Bigot, one who is obstinately and zealously attached to an opinion that you do not entertain.
[ Bigotry ]
Ambrose Bierce
Calamities are of two kinds: misfortune to ourselves, and good fortune to others.
[ Calamity ]
Ambrose Bierce
Confidante. One entrusted by A with the secrets of B confided to herself by C.
[ Gossip ]
Ambrose Bierce
Convent. A place of retirement for women who wish for leisure to meditate upon the sin of idleness.
[ Nuns ]
Ambrose Bierce
Corporation. An ingenious device for obtaining individual profit without individual responsibility.
[ Business ]
Ambrose Bierce
Deliberation. The act of examining one's bread to determine which side it is buttered on.
[ Deliberation ]
Ambrose Bierce
Divorce. A resumption of diplomatic relations and rectification of boundaries.
[ Divorce ]
Ambrose Bierce
Don't steal; thou it never thus compete successfully in business. Cheat.
[ Business ]
Ambrose Bierce
Duty. That which sternly impels us in the direction of profit, along the line of desire.
[ Duty ]
Ambrose Bierce
Egotist. A person of low taste, more interested in himself than me.
[ Egotism ]
Ambrose Bierce
Erudition. Dust shaken out of a book into an empty skull.
[ Scholars and Scholarship ]
Ambrose Bierce
Experience is a revelation in the light of which we renounce our errors of youth for those of age.
[ Experience ]
Ambrose Bierce



