Mark Twain
189 quotations
There are lies, damned lies, and statistics.
All you need in this life is ignorance and confidence, and then Success is sure.
Let us be thankful for the fools. But for them the rest of us could not succeed.
There's always something about your success that displeases even your best friends.
Man is the only creature who has a nasty mind.
We like a man to come right out and say what he thinks, if we agree with him.
Man is the only animal that blushes -- or needs to.
A classic is something that everybody wants to have read and nobody wants to read.
People are much more willing to lend you books than bookcases.
My books are water; those of the great geniuses are wine -- everybody drinks water.
The man who does not read books has no advantage over the man that can not read them.
Put all your eggs in one basket and then watch that basket.
Education is the path from cocky ignorance to miserable uncertainty.
The best way to cheer yourself up is to try to cheer somebody else up.
Let me make the superstitions of a nation and I care not who makes its laws or its songs either.
I know all those people. I have friendly, social, and criminal relations with the whole lot of them.
To be good is noble, but to teach others how to be good is nobler and less trouble.
It is easier to stay out than get out.
You perceive I generalize with intrepidity from single instances. It is the tourist's custom.
I am an old man and have known a great many troubles, but most of them never happened.
Never tell the truth to people who are not worthy of it.
If you tell the truth, you don't have to remember anything.
I never could tell a lie that anybody would doubt, nor a truth that anybody would believe.
A man never reaches that dizzy height of wisdom that he can no longer be lead by the nose.
Often the surest way to convey misinformation is to tell the strict truth.